Where do I even begin?
How can I ever put into words how precious each of you are to me?
I know that I have told you before that my mom is the one who talked me in to creating this blog this past March.
She told me about some wonderful decorating blogs she had been following. I checked them out, and I was hooked.
I started my blog as a way to document my family life and the things we love. My husband and I were working on our guest house at the time, and I started posting pictures of the progress.
I even entered and won some giveaways! I remember winning my first giveaway and running down the stairs at my house, straight to the phone to call my mom! She was so excited for me.
When I got my first follower, I called my mom.
Every time I posted, I called my mom.
She would read it and call me back later that day and tell me what a wonderful job I had done.
She would give me suggestions on what to post about. We could talk for hours about my blog. I knew she was proud of me.
When we found out Mom had cancer on August 6th, my blog took on a WHOLE new meaning.
It became a place that I could write about my mom and what we were going through.
And you listened.
And you commented.
Your encouraging words were like medicine to my hurting heart.
My mom read your comments too.
She would smile and say, “Oh, Traci, honey, I am so glad you have that blog. It has really been a source of encouragement for you. What a blessing!”
And she was right, you have truly blessed me.
I believe in prayer and so did my mom.
One time I was sitting with Mom at home and I read one of the wonderful prayers that a person had left on my blog.
Mom said that when she hears that people are praying for her, she pictures it in her mind… you holding her hand… and walking her up to the throne of God… then saying, “Lord, here’s Wanda, I am praying for her….”
She said “I find comfort in that because there is no better place to be than at the foot of God's throne.”
I agree. Thank you for walking me up to the throne of God with my Mom. I have truly felt your prayers.
Mom passed away on Tuesday, September 22nd. We had to make plans for the visitation and funeral in the following days. One of the things we wanted at the visitation was a picture video of Mom for people to view while standing in line.
I had made a picture video for my dad on Father’s Day, so I volunteered to make one for Mom.
Because we had so much to do during that week, I didn’t get to start on the video until 10:00 p.m. on Wednesday night, the night before the visitation.
Anyone who knew Mom knew that she loved to take pictures. We have boxes and boxes of childhood pictures. Not albums….BOXES!
I had to sort through all of those boxes to find pictures of Mom. My heart would break as I would look at those precious pictures. She was so beautiful, so wonderful. My heart ached like never before. Yet at times, those same pictures would fill my heart with overwhelming gratefulness for the life God has given me, and the gift of my amazing mother!
It was almost 2 a.m., and I was still combing through pictures. I wanted to do a good job. I wanted my mom to be proud. It was one of the last earthly acts that I would be able to do for my mom.
I thought to myself, “I just can’t do it. I don’t have enough time. It won’t be good enough. My mom deserves the best. I’m so sorry, Mom.”
I picked up a stack of pictures and flipped through them quickly when a small, old note card fell in my lap.
It was a note written to me.
It was written by my mom.
It was Feb. 25, 1980. I was ten years old.
My heart stopped as I read the first line….
Just want you to know I love you.”
The tears began to pour and I couldn’t stop crying. Could Mom see me? Could she feel my weariness? Could she see my broken heart? Boy, did I need to hear those words from her! It was as if I could almost hear her sweet voice.
Here’s what the rest of the card said….
(the other side…)
I cried until I couldn’t cry anymore. And then I found a strength within me to stay up two more hours and finish the video.
Oh the strength of my mother’s love!
I praise God for a mother who documented her love for me on little note cards.
She did it her whole life.
She would write notes to all of her children at different times throughout our lives.
Here is an example of just a few of the notes that I have…
I cannot tell you the comfort and love they have given me during this difficult time.
I wanted to share this idea with you in hopes that all of you beautiful mothers out there would stop for a few minutes today and write the ones you love a little note.
My mom kept notes for us in file folders labeled with each family member’s name. Along with any cards, birth announcements, or other memorabilia that she thought we would treasure someday.
I’m not quite that organized, so I write my notes to my boys in journals. I bought each of them a journal when they were born for me to write in. I haven’t written a ton of letters, but I have written about special events in their lives, funny things they have said, or things I wanted them to know about themselves when they were young.
I hope they treasure their journals as much as I treasure my notes from my mom!
For a while, I’ve decided to do a post each week called “Wednesdays with Wanda”. I want to share even more with you about my amazing mother. She was always so full of good ideas. I already have a ton of things I would like to share with you.
Growing up, she was the food editor for our local newspaper, and she also wrote for Home Life magazine. I would love to share some of her recipes and ideas with you.
I’m really doing it for me though. And for my boys. I want them to be able to have all of this to look back on some day and see glimpses into their Nana’s heart. I know they are so young, and probably won’t be able to remember her much. Maybe this blog will help.
I know it is helping me!
Mom loved my blog. And I will continue writing it in her honor. I am looking forward to posting more regularly in the weeks to come.
I want to leave you with the video I made for Mom’s visitation.
Thank you, Lord for these precious memories…