Wednesdays with Wanda

Mama says, “Take care of your sister.”

*********************************

I have to be real with you…this week has been hard. Real hard.

Monday was my birthday. My first birthday without my mom.

The pain started Sunday night at an engagement party for my sister’s daughter, Courtney. I went to celebrate this wonderful time in her life. But as I sat there to eat, and tried to make conversation, something was missing…

someone was missing…

my Mom.

She would have been the life of the party! She was always walking around the room, making sure everyone had what they needed, and smiling ear to ear. She loved family get-togethers.

My heart ached as I saw my precious Dad sitting at a table without the love of his life. It just wasn’t right.

As we drove home, I couldn’t control the tears, or the aching in my heart. How did this happen? I still need my mom!

When I woke up Monday morning (my birthday), the ache just seemed to get worse. I knew I wasn’t going to get that early morning phone call from Mom. I knew I wouldn’t hear her sweet voice sing happy birthday. No card. No present. No hugs or kisses.

It just didn’t seem like my birthday without Mom. She’s the one that carried me for nine months and gave me my first birthday. She’s the one that made me Raggedy Anne and Barbie birthday cakes. She’s the one that always put thought into each gift she gave me. She was the one that would write “Happy Birthday, Traci” on the bathroom mirror with lipstick so I would see it when I first woke up in the morning. She loved celebrating birthdays. She loved celebrating me.

The void was definitely there on Monday morning. It stayed there for quite some time. Tears just sat on the edges of my eyelids. I would try not to blink and make them fall off.

But the day did get better.

I met my sister and two of my aunt’s (Mom’s sisters) for lunch.

They knew I would be hurting and they knew that I would need them. They are the closest thing to Mom that I have left.

And they promised.

Her sisters promised Mom to watch over her kids.

My sister promised Mom she would take care of me.

When Mom first found out she was sick with cancer, she went to lunch with her sisters. They gave her this cute little figurine.

It’s a figurine of two sisters holding hands on the beach.

It’s called, “Mama says, Take care of your sister.”

And boy, did Mom’s sisters take care of her!

This is Mom (in the pink) with her sisters. She also has a wonderful brother who loved her dearly too.

Mom’s sisters and brother were there for her every step of the way. There was nothing they didn’t do for her!

And there is no doubt in my heart, there is nothing they wouldn’t do for me!

Mom loved that little figurine, and immediately bought one for my sister, Cyndi, and me.

Mom knew we would need each other. She wanted us to have a reminder of that.

Here is what the card in the box said…

Do you see the heart?

Look closely…

There it is, tucked in between their hands.

Mom’s love is always with us.

We will carry her love on together. And we will take care of each other. (And our brother too!)

My sister demonstrated this on my birthday. She went above and beyond to make me feel loved.

I love you, Cyndi.

Here we are after lunch.

Here I am with my Aunt Pat and Aunt Tassy. (My precious Aunt Sue couldn’t make it, and we missed her.)

I know Mom was smiling up in heaven to see them “taking care” of me.

I ended my day with dinner and a movie with my husband. He was so tender and understanding toward me. He knows there is nothing he can say or do to make things better, but he is there for me. I love him more than he will ever know!

Though my birthday was a tough one, I am so thankful for my family and friends who have loved me and prayed for me through it all.

I am truly blessed!

(This is a weekly post that I am doing to honor my wonderful mother, Wanda, who passed away on September 22, 2009. It is a place for me to share precious memories of her…for myself, for you, and most importantly, for my children.)